How to Elope with Kids: Tips, tricks, & Inspiration
ELOPEMENT PLANNER // TRAVEL ELOPEMENT PHOTOGRAPHER // ELOPEMENT IDEAS // ELOPEMENT PLANNING
Bringing your kids along for your elopement doesn’t mean you need to sacrifice intimacy or a dream-worthy experience—it just means you’ll need to do some extra planning! Having them there for your elopement is an incredibly beautiful thing. By making them an integral part of your elopement you’re fostering an even deeper connection as a family unit and modeling a healthy romantic relationship for them.
If you want your kids there, but it doesn’t seem feasible with the plans your heart is set on, there are ways to still connect with them over your wedding day without them physically being present. Facetime them throughout the day and plan a special party with them when you get home! Of course—if you can’t imagine them not being there—bring them!!
Getting married is a MAGICAL experience—your kiddos are going to be pumped to be there with you and feel super special to be there with you. Including them should enhance the magic of this day, so let’s set you all up for success with some planning tips and ideas for how to incorporate them into your elopement!
Be realistic
Here’s the deal, you can’t just copy paste your kiddos into what you’re envisioning for your elopement. If you’re wanting an overseas trip with a lot of activities, a two day backpacking trip to an epic spot, or a high class dinner at the end of the night, ask yourself—how do your kiddos fit into that? Do they?
We all know kids can become tired, grumpy, and hungry at the drop of a hat. That they might be able to physically do something, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be willing to do it when the time comes. You know your kids best, so plan your elopement around them accordingly. Your final plans may not look exactly like how you imagined at first, but that won’t make your elopement any less wonderful!
Have a plan a & b…& c
With any elopement you’re risking things not going according to plan at some point of the day and kids add another layer to that. Make an alternative timeline if they need a nap, bring an extra outfit in case they spill something on themselves, and plan for the patterns that occur in your daily life with them. Life with kids is all about flexibility, right? So having back-up plans set in place for your wedding day will save your sanity and will make rolling with the punches that much smoother!
Safety and accessibility
You want your kiddos to be happy during your elopement, but even more importantly you want to keep them safe! Surely your parental instincts start tingling when thinking about trails next to drop offs and large bodies of water. It’s important to pick an environment where there aren’t risks that you’re constantly worrying about. Before you start grieving the possibility of epic views—stop—this doesn’t mean you need to sacrifice a killer location for your elopement!
There are a ton of jaw-dropping locations that require a short (even paved) hike and some you can even drive right up to! There are countless areas, especially in the United States’ National Parks, that were built for families to enjoy incredible locations outdoors easily and safely.
If your kiddos are capable of doing certain activities and they’re things you already enjoy as a family consider including those into your elopement! Love kayaking together? Rent some! Do you own horses? Plan a family horseback trail ride! Are you off hiking every weekend? Let’s hit the trails! You know best what they can and can’t do.
4 Tips for making your elopement easier with kiddos
1. Bring a designated babysitter
This tip is number one for a reason!! An extra set of hands the day of your wedding is going to be a life saver! This honorary guest will be there to entertain the kiddos, take care of little tasks, wrangle the kids, and be a buffer when you need time just the two of you. Having a person there to help you with the kiddos will give you the peace of mind that they’re being taken care of and it’ll give you freedom throughout the day.
2. Break up the day
Having a day that’s all go, go, go can be hard on the entire family; break activities up with downtime or split your elopement into two days. Being overtired and underfed isn’t fun for anyone! Give yourselves some downtime to eat lunch together, rest, and maybe go your separate ways for an adults only excursion if you have an extra set of hands to leave the kiddos with.
3. Pack distractions
Have their favorite show or movie downloaded on an iPad, pack tried and true and new toys, bring their favorite treat, or a fidget toy. Anything that will keep their hands and minds preoccupied (and raise their spirits). We are not above bribes here!
4. Give them a job
Boy oh boy, kids love to feel important and on a day like your wedding they should! Leading up to your elopement discuss the importance of this day and what it means to you all as a family. Then, give them a task or two, ask them to color you a picture of you all as a family or make them a checklist of everything they need in their backpack. Whatever it is, tell them how helpful and special what they’re doing is.
How to include your children in your elopement
Your elopement should be a special day for everyone!! Here are some meaningful ways your children can be a part of your wedding day:
Do a first look with them
Let them walk you down the aisle
Have them sign your marriage license
Include them in your wedding ceremony:
Say some family vows
Perform a unity ritual
Have them pronounce you married
Explain Leave No Trace (In a way they’ll understand)
One of the most special things about children is their curiosity and excitement about the world around them–being somewhere new on your wedding day will be another experience full of those things for them. Before your wedding day start teaching your kids how to explore the outdoors in a respectful way. A 3 year old might not be able to understand how walking off trails can disrupt the ecosystem, but they will understand that doing that can hurt the plants and make it so more pretty flowers don’t grow so we need to protect them. Don’t underestimate a 5 year old’s ability to understand that littering could bring unwanted animals into the area and if it were to be eaten by one it would get very sick. Get on your kiddo’s level, explain things in ways that they’ll understand!
Remember who this day is really for
When it comes to having children be a part of an intimate experience like an elopement it’s important to remember that although you’re planning for them to be there, this day is ultimately about the love you share as a couple. You’re always going to be a parent, that’s not something you can simply turn off, but you two deserve to take the time to focus solely on your relationship with one another. And the love that made you want to do life together forever.
So… bring an extra hand to help and come stacked with special bribes. And expect the unexpected. You’re about to make lifelong memories together as a family. **Spoiler alert: it’s going to be perfect in ways you can’t even imagine.
